Meet Chase

The name Chase has a duel purpose -  It provides anonymity to our middle child (He almost ended up with the name Chase Henry - but his brother insisted on calling him something else and we went with it).  It also is a perfect description of our life with him.  He is constantly on the go, and we often find ourselves in hot pursuit!  I start of at the beginning - because there always is one - 

Once upon a time . . . . 

Thursday, February 22, 2007,  I left the house for my non-stress test and  ultrasound to check on Chase's breathing and movement.  I already felt nervous, the night before I noticed a drastic drop in his movement.  He was such a squirmy baby.  I would lie in bed and just feel him on the outside of my tummy and smile.  Not the night before.  I felt butterfly movements.  During the test I was pretty nieve.  I didn’t notice the stressed out looks on the nurses face and I just thought he was sleeping through the ultrasound,  even after I drank and entire bottle of orange juice.    When the Doctor came in I was hit with a cold wave of fear and terror.  He believed our baby had the cord wrapped around his neck and was not handling the stress of it very well.  He scheduled me to come in the next day for another non-stress test.

Friday Mr. S went off to work, leaving me with a wonderful friend.  She drove me to the doctors office at 9am and sat with me through the appointment.  Chase still struggled so the doctor sent me to the hospital to prepare for a C-section.  Hooked up to the monitors his heart rate sounded good, and he moved right on target.  The nurse said “Baby sounds just fine.”  I was realieved.   Right before they prepped me for surgery the Doctor came and said "well, we can go ahead and do this or try another option.  We can start you on a Pitocin drip to induce labor and see how he does and if he struggles we can then take him.  I will leave it to the two of you." 

Scared, nervous, excited all at the same time

Proud Poppa

I thought it was odd that the doctor would give me that option.  I looked at Mr. S, he nodded and I told the Doctor I wanted the C-section.  I felt really calm, although when the doctor left I did have guilty thoughts of maybe I should let my baby bake for five more weeks. 

I’m truly glad that we went with my mother’s intuition.  I was prepped, given the spinal block, and at 5:10PM on February 23, 2007 Chase came wailing into this world.  The relief I felt was immense, but short lived.
 

I think the funniest part of this birth was the night before Mr. S expressed his nervousness and fear of going into the operating room with me for fear of fainting.  However, when it was time to take pictures he did it, and instead of sitting back down immediately he continued to watch in fascination at what was going on.The doctor obliged and as he continued to work on me explained some scary facts!

1.  His umbilical cord was in a spot on the placenta that 90% of babies miscarry at.
2.  My placenta was deteriorating - if he had gone to term he would have been stillborn.
3.  Cord wrapped around the neck twice.

4. I didn’t learn this until later but right as they went to pull the baby out his blood oxygen level dropped to zero.  If the Doctor had done the Pitocin I would not have my precious son today.

He was tiny, 5 pounds 6 ounces and 18 inches long.  Mr. S brought him over to me, wrapped up in a blanket.    A team of doctors and nurses insisted that Mr. S bring Chase back, I didn’t get to touch him, kiss him, nothing.  I just got to lay there all by myself as Daddy stayed with the baby and I went to recovery.  I was in recovery for an hour.  I lay there all by myself willing myself to wiggle my toes.  The nurse told me that when I could wiggle my toes they would take me out of recovery.  I sat in a cold room for an hour with no one to tell me how my son was, no one to hold my hand and tell me everything would be okay, nothing.  To date this is still the most horrible experience of my life. 

Under the hood

Two hours later I still hadn’t seen my son.  Scott brought me in a picture one of the nurses took of him with a hood over his face.  I couldn’t even see him clearly.  Chase continued to struggle breathing and the doctor called St. Louis Children’s for a medevac team.   They were taking my baby two hours away from me!  I still hadn’t seen my baby.  Finally, right before they took him to the helicopter the medevac doctors brought him to my bed in an incubator and I got to touch his head.  Five years later I can still feel the downy softness of him.  He was lying on his side, with his face half covered.  I still couldn’t see my baby's face!

That night was probably the hardest of my life.  My husband left to stay with the baby, leaving me alone.  I didn’t have any family in the area and although my Mother got on a plane right away she was in Seattle, Washington.  I shared a room with a young girl (maybe 19) and listened to her baby throughout the night.  She let me hold her baby, but it wasn’t the same as holding my own son. 

Chase started off with a ventilator at 35% oxygen, but the next day he went  down to forced room oxygen using a CPAP.  He still needed  forced air to help him, but he was (and still is) a fighter!!!  He had Transient tachypnea of the newborn, which is liquid on his lungs that normally gets expelled in a normal delivery.  And on top of that his lungs weren't fully developed.  I will be forever indebted to mother’s intuition and a doctor that ended up having to take flak from the medical community for his decision (apparently his decisions was reviewed by a medical board.) 

To this day I still feel a bit of jealousy towards my husband and mother. 24 hours after Chase was born my husband finally got to hold him.  My mother arrived from Seattle just in time to take pictures of that first moment of Kangaroo Therapy.  They both got to hold my baby before I did!  

One happy Momma

Two days later I was finally discharged from the hospital and my mom drove as quickly as she could the two hour drive up into Saint Louis.  When we arrived Daddy was doing Kangaroo Care.   I tell you, when I saw my men I couldn't stop crying.  I was so happy to see them both.  Daddy switched places with me and I got some skin to skin contact w/Chase.  Oh, he did not like leaving his daddy, but as soon as he was with his Momma he calmed down.

Doesn't he look proud.  DD loved becoming a big brother.

While hespent time under the lights I read to him his first book.  "I Love to Cuddle" by Carl Norak.

Getting ready to go home. 

He spent eleven days in the NICU.  We couldn’t afford paternity leave, so during the week it was just my mom and I.  I remember so many times walking into the room with my mom holding her grandson with such contentment.  The two of them have such a special relationship, it is almost as if they are connected by that time!

I always thought about how he was in such a hurry to get here, that now he has to take his time at EVERTHING.  Heck, he didn’t even register on the weight/height charts until he was three).

Elephant Rocks.  We have a picture in this same rock each year. The kids almost don't fit in it anymore

Chase's second book. 

He didn't start sitting up until he was nine months old.  See how the pumpkin props him up

He crawled at eleven months.  This is Easter of 2008.  He wasn't quite sure what to think of the grass.  He's always had issues with how things feel.  I'm surprised it wasn't a warning sign to me for what was later to come.

Perfect example.  He hated the way the tile floor felt at Grandmas house.  He crawled with his knees up off the ground.  He only crawled like this at my mom's house!

At 13 months I was excited that he was saying 'Hi".  It didn't dawn on me that his frequent ear infections (and later diagnosed language disorder) were the cause of his lack of verbal skills. 

 I remember his first steps at the Pumpkin Patch.  He looked so handsome with the November sun radiating off his blond hair.  He was 22 months old.

I was nervous when Lia joined our family.  I worried about how Chase would adjust.  It took some time, but he adores his sister.

At three he spoke in two word phrases.  He was a happy, friendly toddler with many funny idiosyncratic habits.  He would line everything up in even lines and make “choo-choo” noises for hours.  He would be a train for long periods of time moving his arms in front of him as wheels on a track.  He had a hard time focusing on anything.  Sometimes there was an empty look in his face, other times he looked like a lost puppy.  Like the world around him didn’t make sense.  He also had unbelievable anxiety and fears.  

In August I had him screened for the title 1 program at our school districts Early Childhood Education Program.  I have never been so glad that he failed a test in my life.  He scored a zero on the Dial3 and was a shoe in for the program.  This turned my turtle into a caterpillar that is now turning into a butterfly! (sorry, had to use the Very Hungry Caterpillar Game in here somewhere since it IS his favorite game).

Six months later the teachers began testing him for special services.  His vocabulary was growing, but not where they would have liked it to be.  His social skills fell behind the other children, and he had some fine and gross motor skills issues that worried them.  This began a long testing process.  I remember feeling the shock when we first heard the words “Autism”. 

 

The feelings of frustration still overwhelm me as I recall how the Geneticist talked about the myriad of abnormalities my child had with the student doctor – but didn’t explain anything to me.  (I still don’t quite know what it all means because the tests for fragile x and other chromosomal problems came back negative – thank goodness).  The Psychologist informed us that Chase meets several of the indicators of a child on the Autism Spectrum, but because he looked at the blue balloon, gave her high fives, and responded with a cheerful attitude he did not meet their guidelines for Autism.  Their recommendations:  See a neurologist, take some Applied Behavior Analysis classes to learn strategies to better help our child deal with his unique way of seeing the world.

It was the Neurologist who finally looked at the testing and said at this point all indicators point to Pervasive Developmental Disorder – Not otherwise specified.  Basically my kiddo is the proverbial square peg in a round whole.  Later we were able to have another piece of the puzzle fall in to place with a diagnosis of Sensory Processing Disorder


Why do I include this in my story of Chase?  Well, after so many years of looking at my beautiful, intelligent, eccentric son I had a name for it.  It doesn’t quantify who my son is, but it allows me to create a game plan.  It provides him with the ability to go to the Little Gym, which is crucial to his development, without worrying about how it is going to fit into our tight budget.  He needs it, he gets it.  

My son has grown in leaps and bounds.  He has gone from needing to cut his hair in two different stages to sitting pretty still for his teachers to cut his hair in therapy (weird, I know!).  My son can have an entire conversation with you, and even though he often doesn’t quite grasp what is going on around him he improves daily.  He is a joy, he lights up a room with his smile.  I don’t know of one person who hasn’t said that they absolutely LOVE being around my son.  He may have kept me up all night last night clapping his hands, and banging on the bed – but I couldn’t help but smile at his giggles.  He is my sunshine.   I am truly blessed to be his Momma! 

  Edited 6/27/2010 Originally posted February 2012